How To End Your Summer Fling

end your summer fling

end your summer flingSummer is often the season of romance; spending afternoons raging at festivals or strolling on the beach together.  As fall approaches and the leaves start changing, however, it could be time for your summer fling to come to an end. If you can do this compassionately, so that nobody feels devastated, that is best. Here are some tips on how to end your summer fling.

 

Let It Drift Away

Is this a summer fling that neither of you ever took very seriously? If so, then one way to break up is to let you both just drift away from the relationship when the summer ends. Sometimes this is easier and more compassionate for the other person than trying to explain to them why they just aren’t the right person for you.

If you are going to take this approach, first stop initiating contact between you. Your activities as a couple will dwindle, and eventually you can stop responding to their text messages and e-mails, or take a long time to do so. If they ask for some explanation, you can come up with a reason that does not make it personal. Just say something like you’re focusing on different goals now that the summer is over, and the time isn’t right for a relationship.

 

Plan Your Breakup Speech

If your summer romance was more serious than that, you will need to have a breakup speech. Imagine that you are going for an important client meeting or job interview. Of course, you would plan out in advance the main points that you want to cover, and rehearse what you want to say before you get there. Take the same approach to breaking up with your summer fling.

Think about whether you want to end things completely, or if you want to make it a temporary breakup, or even just transition to a friendship. You might regret it if you sever all ties completely, so plan what you would like. Also, think about the reasons you want to cite. Are you heading different directions in the fall? Have there been problems in the relationship? Decide on the major points you want to make.

 

Break Up In Person

It seems like it is easier on your end if you break up with a person by phone call, text message, or e-mail, but it shows more respect for them if you make the effort to have the breakup conversation in person. During the discussion, go over the points you planned out. Be honest about your reasons for breaking up, but try not to be cruel. Don’t blame the other person or make it all their fault. Ideally you can still be friendly with them afterwards.

Going On After The Breakup

Once your relationship is over, your life will go back to what it was like before. Be courteous and respectful towards your new ex. Don’t gossip about them or say bad things about them to others, and don’t talk too much about the breakup or why you did it. Remember that you may still have contact with them in the future, so be nice.

 

If They Keep Calling Stop Answering

Sometimes one fling will be more attached to the other and more inclined to keep the romances past its prime. Don’t fuel the fire or hopes by responding. If they aren’t picking up on the clue that its over stop paying attention to their texts and don’t pick up calls. It just prolongs the inevitable and taints the memory.

summer fling

5 Things That Happen In Movie Sex Scenes That Don’t Happen In Real Life

dakota-johnson-50-shades

dakota-johnson-50-shades

It’s plain and simple, like Mitch in City Slickers said, “Women need a reason to have sex.  Men just need a place”.  We all watch movies and we all have the “Awww I want that” thought, but wake up ladies! The day a sexy hot billionaire, eyeing you in a club, and then whisking you away in his private helicopter are about as likely to happen as seeing a unicorn fly and pee glitter!  Here are five things that happen in movie sex scenes that, unfortunately, just don’t happen in real life:

1)       You wake up with your make up still looking flawless – sike!  You know we all wake up after a night of dancing with mascara and eyeliner under the eyes, our breath smelling like tequila shots, and uh…  chances are “that guy” just might not be as good looking as he was with your drunk eyes in dark club.

2)       It gets so intense that he rips your clothes off – false!  I’m sorry, but if a man rips my favorite top or pencil skirt I’d be sending him an invoice the morning after!  Don’t rip my clothes! Unless of course, you’re Mr. Grey!

3)       The sheet is covering all the right places – yeah right!  You know, it’s just over his legs, but showing off his nice firm butt, and covers your nipples just slightly to give him a tease?  You know right??  No.  The sheet is always in the wrong place. It’s wedged between your legs where he should be or gets tangled when you’re trying to change positions and your foot gets stuck – yeah, that’s the sheet I know.

4)       The romantic caressing and cuddling after awesome sex – haha!  If he doesn’t cum and pass out or go off and start playing Call of Duty you’ve got a charmer lady!  No man “just cuddles” any more… and ladies, we’re guilty too, of just rolling over and tweeting about “this guy” before we even put our panties back on.  #bringbackcuddling

5)       Awesome first thing in the morning sex with the sun beaming through the shades – huh? This does not happen, especially if you have kids!  First thing in the morning are all you girl. Getting the kids ready for school, packing lunches, or taking 45 minutes to blow dry your hair before work.  Or, if you’re like me – part of the 5amclub you’re already in the gym doing squats before he wakes up. Nope – ain’t nobody got time for that!

 

 

Best Ways To Approach a Girl

approach

approachIf a girl seems unapproachable, it’s probably because she’s worth the trepidation: the momentary smile, the way she absentmindedly curls her hair around one finger while she chats with friends, the shape of her hips in those jeans. No eye-roll worthy pick-up line is going to suffice — you need to bring a pistol to this knife fight.

 

Be Napolean Bone-aparte

Confidence is key. You’ve got a dog in this race, and by dog we mean, your penis. But don’t let the wrong head craft your war plan. Tread lightly, because even if this isn’t your dream girl, treating the situation like it’s no ordinary come-on will mean success will surely be yours.

 

Leave the Cheese at La Fromagerie

And know what the hell a fromagerie is. It might sound crazy, but you need to have a classy conversation with a girl before you ever ask for her number. Knowing a thing or two about something other than football and basketball is the best way to get her interested. Pull out your smart phone and check what has happened in foreign policy that day, and come up with an intelligent and thought-provoking foray into a conversation. Smart guys are sexy, because they’re usually successful, but don’t sound too nerdy, or she might feel like she showed up to class without studying for the test. If you can sit down next to her, pull out your phone and act like you’re reading the news for the first time, and look over to her as though you just had to get her opinion on what happened.

 

Don’t Be a Guy Friend

The inherent danger in the non-sexual convo approach is that you might actually get along. You might unwittingly stumble into Just-a-friend-ville — and that’s no where you want to be. Make sure she knows you desire her: Every woman is flattered by subtle clues you want her. Make constant intense eye contact (win the staring contest!) and remember details about her life to bring up later in the conversation.

 

Be Sexy, Not Overzealous

In between chapters of conversation, inject delicate flirtations such as handing her a drink but holding it a few seconds too long. How you look at her should (and will) tell her everything about what you want, and who you are. Just don’t be creepy, or you’ve just blown your chances. Subtlety is key, after all, you just met, and she has a lot more to lose than you.

 

Set a Deadline on Your Next Chapter

If she’s worth all of this trouble, then you’re likely not the first suitor she’s encountered, and you’re certainly not the last — or even the best. Make sure you don’t end up a crumpled business card in the bottom of her purse by setting the stage for the next meeting. If you talked about wine, tell her you were thinking about going to a local winery or tasting and ask her along. If she mentioned she hates golf tell her you feel you both should give the entire sport a chance at the putting range. Make sure you’re not just asking her out on ‘to dinner,’ and she’s way more likely to be intrigued.

 

How to Approach a Guy

flirty wave

blowing a kissYou might think it’s a guy’s job to approach the girl. You might think it’s inappropriate to, or will appear desperate, for you to make the first move. Or you might just simply be terrified of rejection. But the truth is, when you approach a guy, he’ll be taken aback and you’ve instantly secured the upper hand. In encounters with the opposite sex, even that small advantage can make or break control of the outcome.

 

The Eyes Have It

Direct eye contact from across the room is the easiest way to let a guy know you’re interested. Do it repeatedly and you’ll soon find most of the work of The Approach is already done. If necessary, work on your look. Try the Stare-Bashfully Avert Your Eyes-Get Caught Staring Again model. Or the Half Smiling-Little-Hand-Wave rendition. Try out different repertoires in different situations, and see what works best.

 flirty girl waving

Fly Solo

Guys out on their own are a dime a dozen, but everyone knows hot girls travel in packs. If you’ve drifted away from your herd, you’re a stray cat on the prowl and need some petting. You’re on a hunt that’s all about you and no one else. Just be careful to appear independent, but not desperate.

 

Compliment Him

If you’re the type who throws caution to the wind, you can always go the complimentary route. If you are sartorially well-versed and spot a guy in, say, Armani, walk up and compliment him on it. Even if you’re wrong, if you can at least spot a nice suit, it will start a conversation. Just keep it going.

 

Ask for Advice or Help

It’s in a male’s nature to protect the females of their species, so take a lesson from Animal Planet. Come up with an elaborate rouse with your girlfriends and make sure they’re in on it. Walk up to him and ask him for his advice on a problem with your girlfriend — she’s having this issue with her boyfriend that only a man’s perspective can help solve. This has a tandem benefit: 1. It volunteers the information that you’re single: If you were in a relationship, you would have simply asked your boyfriend. 2. It makes him feel like he’s solving a problem for you, and you need him (and only him).

 

Go Through His Wingman

The method of approaching his best friend is the least straightforward but often the most effective. It’s also simple: Go up to his friend and ask him one question: “Don’t tell him I asked you, but does your friend have a girlfriend?” You know full well the first thing he’s going to do is tell his friend you’re interested in him. The bonus of this approach is, if it turns out he actually does have a girlfriend, it might turn out you get a shot at the wingman.

 

5 Tricks to Get Her in the Mood Without Even Touching

seducing a man

get her in the moodHopefully you’re at the point with a girl where you’re not simply praying she goes out on a second date with you. Your work is still not done, however. Keeping a girl in the mood is a battle as constant as regularly flossing. It’s no chore, however. The more creative you are, the more of a challenge it will be — and the more interesting it will be.

Start Flirting Early

There’s nothing worse than a last minute attempt to jump into a girl’s pants at the end of a date. Anyone worth doing is worth doing right, so put in the time and start early. Flirt with her via text while she’s at work. Keep up the momentum with subtle contact throughout the night, such as slipping your hand into her back pocket as you walk along. Give her a light squeeze and a smile every so often to remind her you want her.

 

Location, Location, Location

Pimping out your atmosphere is one of the most effective ways to turn her on. It doesn’t have to be as cliché as incense and rose petals on the bedspread, but don’t underestimate the power of a little ‘Fling’ Shui. Try relaxing the setting with something a little more original, such as running through the sexiest selections in your record collection together. Don’t forget the subdued lighting: a soft pink glow hides many a flaw…and inhibition.

Boost Her Self-Confidence

Don’t talk about other girls you think are hot all night, just keep the focus on her, and how much you want her in less than obvious ways. Go gaga over how cute her toes are, or long her neck is. Compliment her intelligence and wit, with subtlety: “You know I don’t think I know one single person who would ‘get’ that joke…”  She will gain self-confidence and admire you in return, which will go a long way later when you’re taking her clothes off.

Dominance

Women generally want a man to take control — just don’t take it too far. You don’t want to get rape-y or forceful, just use your natural advantages to dominate her. When the date is winding down, say as a matter of fact that she’s staying at your place tonight. When she gets all coy and protests, stop her and maintain eye contact until she gives in.

Liquor

When all else fails, get her buzzed. (Note that this says buzzed and not wasted.) No one wants to wake up with regret in the morning — wondering what the hell you’ve done is a major turn off.