5 Things That Happen In Movie Sex Scenes That Don’t Happen In Real Life

dakota-johnson-50-shades

dakota-johnson-50-shades

It’s plain and simple, like Mitch in City Slickers said, “Women need a reason to have sex.  Men just need a place”.  We all watch movies and we all have the “Awww I want that” thought, but wake up ladies! The day a sexy hot billionaire, eyeing you in a club, and then whisking you away in his private helicopter are about as likely to happen as seeing a unicorn fly and pee glitter!  Here are five things that happen in movie sex scenes that, unfortunately, just don’t happen in real life:

1)       You wake up with your make up still looking flawless – sike!  You know we all wake up after a night of dancing with mascara and eyeliner under the eyes, our breath smelling like tequila shots, and uh…  chances are “that guy” just might not be as good looking as he was with your drunk eyes in dark club.

2)       It gets so intense that he rips your clothes off – false!  I’m sorry, but if a man rips my favorite top or pencil skirt I’d be sending him an invoice the morning after!  Don’t rip my clothes! Unless of course, you’re Mr. Grey!

3)       The sheet is covering all the right places – yeah right!  You know, it’s just over his legs, but showing off his nice firm butt, and covers your nipples just slightly to give him a tease?  You know right??  No.  The sheet is always in the wrong place. It’s wedged between your legs where he should be or gets tangled when you’re trying to change positions and your foot gets stuck – yeah, that’s the sheet I know.

4)       The romantic caressing and cuddling after awesome sex – haha!  If he doesn’t cum and pass out or go off and start playing Call of Duty you’ve got a charmer lady!  No man “just cuddles” any more… and ladies, we’re guilty too, of just rolling over and tweeting about “this guy” before we even put our panties back on.  #bringbackcuddling

5)       Awesome first thing in the morning sex with the sun beaming through the shades – huh? This does not happen, especially if you have kids!  First thing in the morning are all you girl. Getting the kids ready for school, packing lunches, or taking 45 minutes to blow dry your hair before work.  Or, if you’re like me – part of the 5amclub you’re already in the gym doing squats before he wakes up. Nope – ain’t nobody got time for that!

 

 

Miley Cyrus’s Racy Flaming Lips Video

 

Miley Cyrus’s Racy Flaming Lips Video is getting a lot of attention from the media  for her almost naked appearance.

7 Celebrities Who Are All About Sex

Most modern day celebrities have it all; fancy cars, million dollar mansions and people that wait on them hand and foot. With so many of life’s luxuries at their disposal, it should come as no surprise that many celebrities are obsessed with another form of instant gratification — sex. The following is a list of celebs that, besides being known as giants in their respective industries, are also just as well known for being all about sex.

Taylor Swift

Will Taylor Swift ever, ever, ever keep her legs together? I guess you don’t really have to when you’re a blonde bombshell millionaire in your mid-twenties.

 

 

Howard Stern

Known to his loyal fans as being, “The King of all Media”, Howard Stern has a reputation for being as obsessed with sex as he is with Bababooey’s teeth.

Tracy Morgan

“I’m gonna make you pregnant” is Tracy Morgan’s signature line. If he’s not taking his lines from a script he’s usually talking about women’s feet and his strange affinity for c-section scars… Yikes!

 

Katie Price

Her celebrity status definitely isn’t as big in the US as it is in England, but after announcing that she was having a 48-hour sex marathon back in 2009, Katie Price’s name will always be associated with sex.

 

David Duchovny

This ex X-Files star was so vocal about his sex addiction that it actually helped him land a leading role in the Showtime series, “Californication”.

 

Jesse James

Remember this guy? If so, you’d probably like to forget. Jesse James turned from “bad boy” to straight up scumbag in the eyes of the public after cheating on Sandra Bullock with tattoo artist Kat Von D.

 

Tiger Woods

Maybe the most infamous celebrity turned sex addict, Tiger Woods’ obsession with sex cost him his marriage, millions of dollars in endorsements and the respect of the general public.